How to love maturely without falling back into the mystical trap of illusion

By Anelly Aya Anelly Aya
  Sometimes the night greets me with a strange sensation — not so much pain as a question , one that slips into the periphery of my thoughts like a light unsure of whether it wishes to remain. After every disappointment there arrives this moment: the moment when you no longer ask “Why did it happen?” but begin to listen to a quieter, almost prayerful inner register: “How can it not happen again?” Not as self-blame. Not as fear of falling once more. But as the desire to learn to love without breaking apart, without turning love into a field where your own shadows outweigh the light. I write these lines as if in a diary, though I’m not entirely sure whether I’m speaking to myself, to time, or to that invisible presence I sometimes call soul , sometimes God , and sometimes simply my own inner ground . Here I want to gather not rules, but orientations; not boundaries, but supports; not prohibitions, but quiet, almost invisible paths toward maturity. Paths that do not reject the myst...
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Moving from a place of "What will people think?" to "I am enough"

By Anelly Aya Anelly Aya

 Moving from a place of "What will people think?" to "I am enough" can be a transformative journey that involves cultivating self-acceptance, self-compassion, and a strong sense of self-worth. Here are some steps that can help you along this journey:

✅ Recognize the role of social conditioning: Many of us grow up with messages from society, family, and culture that we need to be a certain way in order to be accepted and loved. We may have learned to prioritize other people's opinions over our own needs and desires. Recognizing the role of social conditioning can help you begin to question these messages and develop a stronger sense of self.

✅ Practice self-awareness: Take time to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Notice when you are seeking external validation or when you are being critical or judgmental of yourself. Cultivate a non-judgmental attitude towards your own experiences.

✅ Challenge negative self-talk: When you hear the inner critic telling you that you are not good enough, question the validity of these messages. Ask yourself if they are based on fact or on a distorted perception of reality. Practice replacing negative self-talk with more positive and affirming messages.

✅ Cultivate self-compassion: Be kind and supportive to yourself, especially during difficult times. Recognize that making mistakes and experiencing setbacks are a normal part of the human experience. Practice treating yourself as you would treat a good friend.

✅ Identify your values and priorities: Get clear on what is important to you and what you stand for. Make decisions that align with your values, even if they are not popular or widely accepted.

✅ Take action: Use your newfound sense of self-worth to take action towards your goals and dreams. Take risks and pursue your passions, even if they challenge the status quo.

Remember, this is a lifelong journey and it's normal to experience setbacks or moments of self-doubt along the way. Be patient and kind with yourself and continue to practice self-acceptance, self-compassion, and a strong sense of self-worth.

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